A tale of two bruises

Not so long ago, our air conditioner decided to stop working. It was an ancient machine that had seen many seasons so it’s demise wasn’t unexpected. Of course, our luck being what it was, this happened at the worst possible time.

It was the day that the painters were here to paint; the day that the contractor was here to figure out how to pave our driveway and the day that Mother Nature decided to give us a massive heat wave.

It was burning hot outside and it was sweltering inside.Of course, I did what I do in situations like this and panicked. I called every air-conditioning business in town. Within minutes, everyone in the vicinity had heard about our furnace-like house and there was a guy on the way with the largest air-conditioner available for human use.

He sweated his way up the driveway laughing at the heat and removed a step on our wooden stairway to access our old machine and remove it. While he was busy working and our painters were sweating their way through the job, I moved our dogs out to the shade to keep them a little cooler than inside the oven-like house.

And that’s when it happened.

I knew there was a step missing on those stairs. I knew it. Yet I stepped on the missing step as though I could walk on air…and fell down like a sack of potatoes. The paint was horrific, the blood was awful and the bruising that ensued covers one complete leg and the other hip and stops people metres away. Still, I could have broken a bone or gotten impaled; I got off lucky.

lovely colours, right?
ugh

It was at that exact moment that our two fluff-balls of dogs discovered I had yet to close the gate to the backyard and off they went. Curly tails into the wind, they ran away, delighted at their newly-found freedom.

I should have stopped and given them a chance to figure out where their next meal was coming from, but never let it be said that I miss an opportunity to panic. Off I went, blood running down a leg, limping like an injured flamingo, running after them.

Don’t worry, gentle reader, the dogs are back unharmed. As soon as the air conditioner started working, they reappeared to lay down on the air vents. I gave them a serious talking to that went mostly in one ear and out the other. Filthy, tired and hot, they still looked much better than their bruised, sore owner.

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