Maggie’s squirrels

My friend Maggie is a character you couldn’t make up; she’s got way too much personality. For example, she doesn’t greet others with hello or hi, she says: Hey! How are things on the planet?! (usually loudly enough that everyone hears her within a five-mile radius). I usually see her at my favourite coffee shop and hear the latest in her never-boring life. This time, she has squirrels. Literally.

Maggie’s little home is so nice, a group of squirrels have decided they’d like to share it with her. Uninvited, they’ve snuck in and taken over the attic. Maggie has tried everything to get rid of her unwanted guests. So far, nothing’s worked.

First, she tried ignoring the squirrels and hoping that they would simply leave. Well, the squirrels loved this plan. They settled in, brought friends, then proceeded to mate with them.

Maggie decided to trap them. She caught six, drove away, then set them loose (along with giving them some nuts to get started on their journey–I did mention she’s a bit of a character). Two days later, the squirrels were back in her house.

Maggie explained all this to me in her typically loud voice, stirring her coffee in a nervous movement that reminded me of her nemesis, the squirrels. She hadn’t slept in weeks–the squirrels had kept her up–and she didn’t know what to do next.

I would have suggested an exterminator but Maggie is a kind soul who loves animals and she doesn’t want to hurt the little dears.

I didn’t have the heart to tell her that spring is coming.

And with it, baby squirrels.

What do you think?

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